Do you think that people you work with, your family, your friends, or the community in which you live would not be able to get along without you?
Do you have a sense that without you things would not get done, that your importance to any given situation is critical for success?
Are you a person who is unwilling to take time off, let go, or take extended vacations because without your presence, Johnny on the spot, everything would come to a horrible conclusion or worse?
Like many of us today I have a strong feeling that if I take too much time away from my activities things will some how not be as good, creative, or as meaningful as I would like them to be. If I am away I think that things might not go my way or in the direction that I believe to be best.
This is my never ending ego getting in the way of me being a “human being” instead of a “human doing” and focusing my attention on my delusional level of high importance. Yes, I may play a role, act as a tool for good, or contribute to a team, but in the end things go on with or without me.
“The man who thinks he can live without others is mistaken; the one who thinks others can’t live without him is even more deluded.” Hasidic Saying
Guess what? Life keeps on keeping on with or without you as well. Governments continue without any particular President. Kingdoms continue with different Kings and Queens. Families go on without certain family members. Advertisers keep advertising, taxes keep coming, bills keep piling up, and the earth keeps turning with or without you being around.
Here is something to think about. There will always be more in your inbox than in your outbox when you die. And after you do die, bills will keep coming in and the ongoing impact of your life will continue even without you.
What are you living for; is being important and working hard the most important thing to you?
Alexander the Great may have made one of the most vivid points about life after his death. As part of his funeral, his request to be paraded over miles of cobble stone roads carried by those who had been part of his life. People took turns carrying his coffin through the streets. His arms dangled out of holes in the right and left side of the coffin showcasing that even though he ruled most of the world during his reign he could not take any of it with him. It was a vivid reminder that life keeps on keeping on with or without even Alexander the Great!
As I sit on a sandy beach on Isla HolBox in Mexico, I wonder how so many of us get to such a place where our perceived importance overtakes our ability to play, to relax, to take time for family and friends, and to spend more time with our toes in the sand.
Nothing is so important that you are not able to take time for yourself, time spent to recharge and reinvigorate yourself. On the flip side, you are not so important to any project or endeavor that without you things will not work out just as they are supposed to.
“One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” Bertrand Russell
Next time you think to yourself, “I could really use a vacation.” Take it! Next time you think, “I would really like to play ball with my son.” Do it! Next time you feel like taking a break, take it!
Letting go of our perceived importance is difficult work to be sure, but it is worth doing.
When you are able to take the steps of letting go and embrace your role as “a player” in a much larger world instead of seeing yourself as “the critical player,” doors will open for you and you will have the great potential to set yourself free.
Because in the end, no matter what you think or believe, life keeps on keeping on with or without you.
Let me know what you think.
Until next week remember, the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.