Posts Tagged ‘attitude’

Giving Back

Wednesday, March 18th, 2009

Do you want to know one of the most powerful ways to increase your influence and wealth?

Do you want to know a way to improve your quality of life and to grow your network of friends and resources?

Sure you do, and guess what, you have the ability to do with ease. It is not even a new idea and it has been working for thousands of years with those who are willing to take the time.

It is through giving back that we have the ability to gain the most from our lives. Yep, giving back to our community, to our family, to our friends, and even to nature is when we can gain the most.

“You give but little when you give of your possessions.  It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

Here is an example of how it works. I have a skill of visually facilitating people and organizations to new levels of thinking and action. Many people need this type of talent to support them in moving to the next level of growth. As a way to give back I shared my skills at no cost to a non-profit organization to help them focus their energy and talents. They were please with the outcome which was just what they were looking for.

The positive feedback that I received confirmed that the work that I did with them contributed to improvement. Sounds good so far eh? But wait there is more. It is not until a year later that I got a call one of the board members that had been looking for the right opportunity to plug me into a corporate session she was in charge of. Just like that what I gave was returned not only money, but also in tremendous trust that I was the right person for the job. Hired I am and the relationship continues on and on.

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” William James

Very powerful indeed, yet why is that so many of us out there are only willing to give when we know for sure we are going to get something back, or worse yet, we only are going to take and not give anything away?

Giving back has the power to help you reach your dreams. Do you want to be an environmentalist who works with saving dolphins? Find out who needs your help and sign up to give away your skills, even if those skills mean holding the radar that monitors dolphin movement.

Do you want to start a business, but don’t know where to start? Find a company that is like the one you would like to start and see if you can give away your talents and skills part time to get your foot in the door. See if you really like what you think you want to do and then learn what it takes to do what you want to do.

Do you want to get more integrated into your community? Join a board or two that focuses their activities on something you are passionate about. The next thing you know you are plugged in to your community and new opportunities will show themselves along the way.

Now there is a caveat in all of this. You have to show up when you give “it” away. You can’t just sit down, walk around, and not contribute something of value. You must be pro-active and positive. Giving not only of your time to show up to board meetings, but also getting things done when the board does not meet makes it all come together.

This is one of the secrets people with happy, connected, and influential lives have and now you can have this as part of a life of giving too. And guess what? It doesn’t cost you anything but your time.

You say you don’t have any time that you are already stretched to the limit? There is a saying out there that I have found to be true, “If you want to get something done give it to a busy person.” Why do you think that is? Perhaps it is because busy people have learned how to maximize their time and are able to pull resources to make things happen in a highly effective way.

“I am only one, but I am one.  I cannot do everything, but I can do something.  And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do.” Edward Everett Hale

One way to find more time is to reduce or remove the time you watch television. Amazingly, the average person in America watches 4 hours of television a day. What that translates into is that in a 65-year life, the person watching 4 hours of television a day will have spent 9 years of their life glued to the boob-tube.

Think about how much you could do with those 9 years if you spent them giving back, contributing to your community, and reaching for your full potential. There is no time like the now to start.

Where ever you want to go in life you can get to if you are willing to work hard enough to get it. Giving back is a good place to start.

“The purpose of life is not to be happy – but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all.” Leo Rosten

Let me know what you think.

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

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The Time is Now!

Thursday, January 15th, 2009

How many of us are looking for more meaning and purpose in our lives?

“The Old Year has gone.  Let the dead past bury its own dead.  The New Year has taken possession of the clock of time.  All hail the duties and possibilities of the coming twelve months!” Edward Payson Powell

How many of us are just going through the motions in our daily lives?

“Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits.” Author Unknown

How many of us are willing to go through the journey to discover our greater purpose?

“We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched.  Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives… not looking for flaws, but for potential.” Ellen Goodman

NOW is the perfect time to start the process of kicking butt with your life! You can begin by thinking about the kind of future you want to create for yourself. I truly believe you can create in your life whatever it is you desire the most. Thinking and visualizing positive thoughts about whatever it is you most desire will, in time, create that which you think about and focus energy on.

Ringing in the New Year is an extremely powerful time in my life. It is the time of year when my wife Kristen and I take the time to review our successes and failures, to take in the lessons learned, and then apply them to our updated life design.

“I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious effort.” Henry David Thoreau

I started the process of brainstorming and visualizing personal goals and objectives on large pieces of paper at a very early age. Developing this kind of a visual history of my life has become an important tool to support my understanding of how my time and energy is spent as I work towards creating what I most desire for my life.

Here is how it works:

Either by yourself or with your significant other/friend, find a couple of big pieces of paper – a paper grocery bag can work well. You may want to tape some paper together to make the surface bigger. Kristen and I use a 4’ x 14’ piece of paper when we go through this process.

Step One

In the center of the paper write/draw “Creating My Life, My Way, Today!” If you are working with another person have them do the same on a separate piece of paper.

Step Two

Randomly, write/draw words that categorize your life activities and actions. Make sure to allow plenty of space so you can add additional details around each of your categories. Here are some examples of categories that I like to use:

    • Family/Friends
    • Career/Business
    • Health/Physical
    • Finance
    • Home Environment
    • Community
    • Fun/Recreation
    • Personal Growth

Step Three

After you have developed your categories, focus your energy and attention on each category, one at a time. Write down your ideal goals and outcomes for that category in the coming year. Take your time, writing as many aspirations as you can think of. The key is not to over think your idea. Usually the first thoughts you think of are what you truly desire. Use the same process for the remaining categories.

Step Four

Compare your Life Creating Visual with your significant other or good friend. Have each person share their entire visual one at a time. Next, start looking for the areas where you can support one another in achieving each other’s goals for the coming year. Make sure to talk about the challenges and success factors to achieving the goals and outcomes. Stay realistic. Set yourself up for success instead of failure.

Step Five

When you have your Life Creating Visual completed post it in a place where you can see it every day: the wall into the bathroom, your bedroom mirror, anywhere you visit and spend time thinking. Just post it!

I know what some of you are thinking right now, “This is going to be a lot of hard work and take up a bunch of my time.” I feel the same way at times and I just don’t want to go through the hassle to do this kind of personal growth work. Guess what? I still do it, and then after all is said and done, I wonder why I even hesitated at all. Getting over the hump to create the life you want takes effort. In the end nothing could be greater than living the life you create each and every day.

“The important thing is to strive towards a goal which is not immediately visible.  That goal is not the concern of the mind, but of the spirit.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Time is running out! How are you going to create the rest of your life?

Let me know what you think?

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create for yourself.

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Embracing Change

Monday, November 24th, 2008

Embracing change is one of the greatest challenges we face as humans. Change is accelerating at an ever increasing pace and if we do not learn to embrace, or at a minimum accept, the changes taking place globally we will in all likelihood wake up one day and say to ourselves, “Was I sleeping? How did we get so far behind?”

Many of us are so caught up in our own lives that we are blinded by the realities of what is taking place outside our daily activities. We get so focused on ourselves that we lose sight of the bigger picture. Because of this self-centered focus many of us are unable to see the changes going on outside ourselves, changes that can have direct or indirect influence on our lives.

Nothing stays the same and if we are going to be a relevant as a community we need to collectively wake up to our changing world and figure out how we can be a part of these changes.

Our challenge is not to forget how we got to where we are and remember that to be relevant we must continually reinvent ourselves. We cannot live life in a bubble thinking that we can remain the same.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Victor Frankl

When we think outside-of-the-box and look beyond what we know learning takes place and we increase our chances of being relevant players in our increasingly changing world.

Instant gratification is a growing phenomenon and it is preventing us from seeing how we contribute to a positive or negative future for the generations ahead.

Now more than ever the world needs for us to take a “long view,” a view that allows us to look toward the kind of future we want to create for our descendants. The decisions we are making today have the ability to create a positive impact on the future or our decisions have the ability to have a potentially negative impact.

When you allow your mind to imagine future scenarios as they connect to past events and current activities you will start to link and form new ideas and creative and innovative scenarios.

“Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.” Pauline R. Kezer

Today we need to be thinking about the future we are creating. This means that we will have to take calculated risks, think beyond our comfort zone, out-of-the-box, and collaborate with others.

With the pace of change accelerating and the desire for instant gratification growing, it becomes imperative to think out ahead into the future so we can make the best decisions today, decisions that will have a positive impact on the future.

When you are open to letting your imagination wander, enabling connections to be made, new and powerful solutions become possible.

We need to get serious about expanding and exercising our creativity as individuals and a nation. This means thinking differently about how we go about interacting, relating, and doing business with the world and ourselves.

“They must often change, who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.” Confucius

Let me know what you think.

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

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Going With the Flow

Sunday, July 13th, 2008

Have you ever noticed that when you try not to become something you don’t want to be the more you become that very thing? Or that the more you focus energy on what you fear the quicker that fear becomes reality? All of this has to do with resisting the way things are. When we are unaware of the flow of life we fight it and attempt to change a situation to suit our particular needs, fears, or desires. The world would be quite a different place if we all would learn how to let life just happen.

“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” Mary Engelbreit

Going with the flow means accepting what is and not necessarily what it is you desire. We all fear losing control and yet overcoming our fear of losing control supports our ability to go with the flow. All of us are happy when things go well, but when things aren’t going “my” way or the way “I” want we get upset and then attract more of the same. This is how the flow of life works. We can’t control everything, even if we would like to think we can, which causes us to resist what is and to go against the flow of life. What we can do is to respond to what is and come up with creative solutions to adapt to a situation or to change it, enabling us to go with the flow of life.

Are you going with or against the flow of life?

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” Winston Churchill

One reason we kick ourselves out of the flow is because we are attached to outcomes. Here is where resistance comes in. We set our expectations in such a way that we become attached that a certain outcome will turn out the way we envisioned it. When the outcome does not go the way we expect we tend to go against the flow and create negativity in our lives. It is important to visualize positive outcomes in life. The key is to visualize these outcomes for the highest good of yourself and others. Then here is the challenging part. Once we have our outcome visualized we need to detach from it. No small task that is for sure. That doesn’t mean that we need to give up. It means we need to take creative initiative to respond to the situation in a different way.

Do you trust the life process?

“I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.” Pablo Picasso

I can remember a time back in 1997 when I was running StudioFX, an up and coming Internet company in Silicon Valley. Like many start up companies we had our fair share of cash flow problems and funding issues. It was during one of these down cycles that money became tight. We had successfully secured exclusive Internet broadcast and ecommerce rights to a number of classic television shows including the Underdog Show and the Lone Ranger. The Underdog show and Lone Ranger were with Golden Books Entertainment and we were obligated to pay licensing fees for the rights. As timing would have it our fees became due during this monetary down cycle.

My first thought was, “How am I going to keep these agreements if I can’t pay for them?” Funding in the pipeline was partially attached to these contracts and others being negotiated. If we lost these deals things could be a challenge going forward. I was losing control and had to do something, even if I did nothing that was something. It would have been easy to stick my head in the sand and do nothing and wonder when I would get the call that our contract was up. I could have given up. Instead, I took creative initiative to respond to the situation in a different way. I took a risk and called Golden Books to discuss our money challenges and that payment was going to be a little late. To my surprise they were more than willing to extend the time for payment on my licensing fees. All my fears and projections of having to control the situation were not accurate at all. To this day whenever I am in need of being reminded of the power of being in the flow I just think of Underdog.

What examples do you have of being in the flow?

The reality is that we are already in the flow of life. The question is are we going to resist and object to what life presents us or are we going to take creative initiative to respond to what is? Life has its cycles that at times are up and others are down. When you become aware of the flow of life and embrace the power of letting go of control and fear you align with the currents and flow of life. You receive what you need, rather than what you want. The interesting part of going with the flow is that over time these two dynamics have a strong magnetic attraction to each other and at some point unite.

The fact is that this kind of life awareness is not easy. I have to work on it everyday, every hour and every minute. Sometimes I fail miserably. Sometimes I am in the flow so much that every event of the day plays out with ease and grace. I continually have to remind myself to focus on creating each day for a higher good, to let go and surrender from being tied to specific outcomes. I figure it will take the rest of my life to get this one down.

“Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

With practice you can learn to go with the flow as well.

Let me know what you think.

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

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