What Box?^®

Growing up a dyslexic with ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder) and who knows what other tags that have been hung on me, I rarely made it through a school year with out getting removed or punished by the system in some fashion or another. I can still hear the teachers saying, “You will never amount to anything young man. I’ll be surprised if you make it past a car salesman” – motivational and inspiring words to say the least. I am very glad that I did not take these words to heart and instead carved my own path through life.

One of the outcomes of always being in some kind of situation that required me to be reprimanded was that I was never was allowed to attend the school dances or proms. I take that back I did get to go to my Junior High dance but was quickly removed and my parents were called to pick me up because I had found it was more fun to hang out with the band back stage than be out on the dance floor. All this did was help to secure my fate for future dances and proms.

I have always wondered what it was like to be part of prom. I wondered what I had missed by not participating in something so many people have experienced. I always envisioned myself taking in the last moments of childhood. The “Lake Bum” will be able to relate to this; sneaking in a bit of booze to share with the other students. Taking the most powerful and beautiful women to the prom to share in the experience and maybe even being crowed Queen and King. The dancing, the memories, the mirror ball, and the right of passage. Ah the fantasy of it all. If anything I have a great imagination.

But alas a prom was not to be a part of my life and I had given up on the idea that I would ever have the opportunity to experience a prom for myself. Being removed from so many schools and never officially graduating. I have been left with an empty feeling about this one, a tiny empty feeling, but an empty feeling just the same. The emptiness only comes up when family and friends talk about their fond memories of their prom nights. I was left with fantasy and imagination.

When I first met Kristen, my wife, she shared with me that she too had never been to a prom. I thought this kind of strange. If you know Kristen, this does not seem to make sense. I would have imagined her going to dozens of proms. We found another common bond and both shared in our fantasies of what it would have been like if we had gone to a prom. It has always been fun to imagine and dream about this.

Then out of the blue my good friend in Tulsa, Ted Cundiff, gave me a call asking if Kristen and I would like to attend a fundraiser with him and his wife LaTonya at the Cains Ball Room. I was not sure if we could fit it into our schedule so I needed to confirm with my social secretary, Kristen of course, and get back to him. We had the opening and agreed to go.

About a week before the event Kristen began to ask questions about the evening, such as the themes and what to wear, etc. I did not have one clue about any of these questions so I called Ted to confirm it all. When he said that it was a recreation of a high school prom I almost flipped. It started to look as though my fantasy and imagination was about to become reality. Kristen got excited and we had our first prom to attend.

Let me tell you, it was worth the wait. We danced, I learned to dip, we were able to win a number of great art pieces at the silent auction and we ate and drank till our hearts content. We shared in a fantastic prom night. It was way beyond my fantasy or imagination and I was able to share it with the most important, beautiful and special women in my life. What a joy.

Now both Kristen and I can share with friends and family, all about our prom night experience, what we remember of it, and my small empty space if filled with joy, love and great memories. Thank you Ted and LaTonya for such a memorable evening.

Goes to show you just never know.

Let me know what you think.

Write me at sean@whatbox.info or The Chronicle of Grand Lake PO Box 757 Langley, OK 74350 c/o What Box? Visit www.whatbox.info to learn more.

Dear Sean,
I enjoyed reading your article last week on the Creative Nature of Humans. I grew up in a family that always bought the latest and greatest and got rid of anything that wasn’t used in a 12 month period of time. I really don’t have any idea where to begin to be creative in using what I already have to meet my current needs. Money is tight and I would really like to know where to start.
Help!

Dear Help!
Consumption seems to be something that is drilled into us all the time, every day. Creativity starts in how you think about the world you live in. Focus on the positive in every situation, something that is easier said than done. Avoid using or buying disposable dishware, this can cost a lot of money. Go to the store less and instead buy for two weeks at a time. Look for the opportunities to grow, stretch and expand your talents. Get involved in community projects, staying open to new possibilities. Spend quality time with yourself just daydreaming and write down your thoughts. Creativity is all around you. Go ahead and plug in.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

Earlier this week I was watching a little quality TV on Oklahoma Public Television. This particular special was focused on a group of people who were reliving their childhood by taking a train ride along the Colorado River. What they all had in common was that they had all taken, at one time or another, the same train with their family and friends before planes became the new standard for long distance travel.

The train snaked from Denver to Utah and through some of the most challenging and awe inspiring landscape in the United States. The power of the river and beauty of the canyon walls took my breath away even through I was experiencing their adventure on a small screen television.

The wonder, vision and determination to build a train track system through this part of the country got me thinking. It was not that long ago, the only way to get through this treacherous terrain was by horse and even more challenging covered wagon. If you survived the trip it would take you months to reach your destination. 1890 was only 115 years ago. Heck, the Guinness Book of World Records just named the oldest living woman on earth at 125 years old. She was born in 1880. Just think about the change and progress she has been witness to in her lifetime.

What drives all this creative use of energy and imagination?

David Rockefeller said, “If necessity is the mother of invention, discontent is the father of progress.”

Creative thinking is the process that humanity has used from the beginning of time. Even the caveman had to be creative in how they controlled fire and in the tools they created to hunt and cook with. As we learned to expand our creative thinking time has brought us to the modern conveniences that we have today. The types and number of inventions running through the United States patent office is staggering. Inventions such as the telephone, fax machines, electric utility companies, planes, hula hoops, railroad systems, personal computers, the pet rock, radio, bifocals, and the television.

The products and services that have emerged from all this creativity and imagination all have one thing in common. They all fulfilled a need and met it head on.

We all have a highly creative and imaginative side. Everyday we see needs to be filled. The difference is in the doing verses the thinking. We all have used what we’ve had at hand to create something that would serve our purpose. Children have an innate ability to adapt their surroundings to meet their needs. Using their imaginations they create secret hiding places for themselves utilizing what is in their surroundings such as card tables or blankets instead of buying a fort or a tunnel at the store.

When you think about it for a minute you realize that being inventive, using your imaginative and creative side is in our nature. It is how we survive in the world. What a gift!

Alice Fenton one of the editors of What Box? is always trying to find ways to use what is at hand without going out to find it elsewhere. I can remember when we were starting a digital multi-media center called the Digital Clubhouse Network, http://www.digiclub.org Alice would go and dumpster dive in high tech company trash bins looking for discarded binders, folders, etc. instead of buying them, which, we couldn’t afford to purchase but needed desperately. Thanks Alice. We couldn’t have done it without your persistence to come up with creative and inventive ways to fulfill our needs.

The next time you need something, think up a new idea that fills your need. Do more than think about it. Go out and create it, own it, share it with the world. Your inventive and creative nature has the potential to change the world.

Go for it!

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean,
I am so excited that Spring Time on the lake has finally arrived. All I want to do is go out and enjoy the warm weather and cruise around the lake. I’ve got a major case of Spring Fever! My husband, on the other hand, finds this to be the perfect time of year to do “projects” around the house and yard. This is a major conflict here. Help!!
Lazy Bones

Dear Lazy Bones
I am totally with you on this one. Spring Time in Eastern Oklahoma and especially Grand Lake is one of the more rejuvenating experiences in life. I always get a major case of “Spring Fever.” The challenge is to set aside time each day to get things done that need to be done and balance that with time to enjoy the season, recharging your batteries. Try setting goals for yourself each day, accomplishing all you can. With projects out of the way I think you will find you get much more enjoyment out of your Spring Time.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

Ever had one of those days where your equilibrium is just out of whack, where things are not going well and you end up communicating or acting in ways you wish you could take back or some how receive a “do over?”

Why is it that some days things just seem to be out of Whack?

Many times we have been upset by something earlier in the day that effects our actions. Perhaps we are overworked and are having a difficult time focusing. I know that when I have large challenges and, particularly, when there is more than one thing coming at me all at once I tend slip into a mindset of overwhelm. This results in my saying and doing things that I regret; things, that if I were focused, balanced and present in the moment, would not happen.

Not every day can be a great day, an “on” day. Sometimes the hardest days hold the greatest potential for personal growth. When you say, “Ok, where are the opportunities to learn from this situation?” you start growing, one day at a time. This is where it takes all of our strength so that we are able to realistically look at our unique situation and uncover those areas where we can improve ourselves and then apply these lessons to our lives. No small task indeed.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross said, “Should you shield the canyons from the windstorm, you would never see the beauty of their carvings.”

How can we face the realities of our life and the choices we make?

It is important to show up each and every day being open to the possibilities and taking responsibility for our actions. If you have done something that you believe could have been done better or that was a mistake, say, “I’m sorry, I made a mistake and I want to apologize.” Sorry seems to be one of the hardest words for people to say today. I wonder why?

Is it because we will be seen to have flaws? Or that people will think we are failures? No matter what it is that holds us back from saying we are sorry or that we made a mistake in the end does not serve us well. We are all humans prone to making mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. The challenge is acknowledge our mistakes and learn from them so that we don’t make them again. This shows strength, balance, and a truth none of us can run from. We are all humans and as such we all have faults that at one point or another will rear their ugly heads. In the words of Doug Larson, “To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.”

When you say, “I’m sorry and I made a mistake,” miraculous things happen. The person receiving the apology is grateful, and has a greater trust in you. In addition you have taken one step closer to understanding and facing the realities of your actions. A sigh of relief and you start to learn that it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Although difficult, whenever I have made the effort to say sorry for something I have done, my relationship with that person grows stronger and isn’t that what we all want? Stronger relationships.

What a wonderful place the world would be if we would all acknowledge our mistakes, learn from them and work to keep them from happening again. This is important on many levels: personal, community, town, city, state, national and in the world.

When we wake up each morning we have no way of really knowing how our day is going to go. We do have a choice of how we will respond or act as any given situation comes up. Take a deep breath and know that some days are just whackier than others.

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean,
Your article last week was an inspiration. I’ve printed up some of the Still Some Good cards and I can’t wait to use them. What a great idea!
Feeling Inspired

Dear Feeling Inspired,
Fantastic! My family, friends and I have done the same and am out and about anonymously giving it away. Glad that you will be too. See you around the lake.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.