What Box?^®

It is easy to get a little depressed with all the negative news being broadcast around the world today. Seems like every time I turn on the boob tube, which is not that often, news reporters focus on the negative and even appear to go out of their way to highlight the these negative aspects of our society. Whether it is another murder, child abuse, government corruption, the killing of seals, or a corporation manipulating the system by cooking the books. It is enough to make anyone lose a bit of hope.

This is why I am always on the lookout for the positive in life. You know, an example of what is possible when people focus on the good and work to make a positive difference in the world. Last week, in Tulsa, I met a person who is working to make a positive difference in the world. He has no expectation of receiving anything in return except to make a positive difference and, hopefully, inspire others to do the same. His name is Jeff Beasley and he has created a Web site called www.stillsomegood.com.

The inspiration for this Web site, and his desire to make a meaningful difference, came about because of what could be perceived as a negative event by anyone’s standards. The house he and his wife were living in was flooded and as a result they had to move into a hotel for over a month with, get this, 2 children, 3 cats, 1 dog, and 1 lizard. Not an easy situation by any stretch of the imagination.

In addition to the frustrations of living out of a hotel for much longer than anyone would like, Thanksgiving was fast approaching. The whole ordeal had become overwhelming and I imagine things were getting close to the breaking point. One morning a total stranger walked up to Jeff’s wife and handed her an envelope.

Inside the envelope she found $60. Think about it. An anonymous gift of $60. How fantastic! It made her day. This simple act showed both Jeff and his wife the power that a random act of kindness can have on people, something we rarely see today. The family has never seen the individual again and has never had a chance to say thanks.

That random act, and Jeff’s entrepreneurial spirit, was all it took to inspire him to figure out a way to inspire others to do the same and show that there is still a little good in the world. I just love it.

Kristen, my wife, and I have always been big believers in the power of random acts of kindness. We have bought dinners for people without them knowing it. We have paid bridge tolls for the next three cars behind us. We are big fans of the movie Pay it Forward, but we never thought of formalizing a process in which you can grow the possibility of others getting on the random acts of kindness band wagon.

I want to encourage all of you who read What Box? to visit www.stillsomegood.com and print up a few of the Still Some Good cards. They don’t cost you anything and give so much back. Then go out and share the power of a random act of kindness. Buy someone a cup of coffee. Buy someone a lunch. Buy someone something that they really need. But here is the thing, don’t ever let them know you did it. Make sure to leave the card behind for the person who received the random act so that they can share their story with others on the site and motivate someone else to do the same. I can see the potential of this idea catching on in no time. Thanks Jeff. Keep up the great work.

Charles Kuralt said, “The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines.” We can all make a positive difference. One star fish at a time.

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean,
I have discovered after reading your article last week on creativity that I love to be creative in my cooking . . . trying new recipes and changing old ones. It’s great fun and I think my cooking is really great. My family, however, is missing the old tried and true cooking that I’ve always done. Any suggestions on how to integrate the new with the old?
Cooking up a Storm!

Dear Cooking up a Storm,
Absolutely, one of the keys to making your new creative cooking style palatable for your family is transition. My suggestion is that you slowly integrate new recipes and concoctions, while maintaining some of the tried and true. Look for the dishes that your family enjoys and starts requesting. These new dishes will become a standard and part of the new tired and true dinner meals. Like so many things in life it takes patience and persistence to change established patterns.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

It was Picasso who said, “We are all born artists, the challenge is to stay one.” Even in the best and most supportive of circumstances the creative path, the path of discovering, accepting and embracing ourselves as being uniquely expressive individuals, is not an easy one. We can all recall times during our early years when our creative talents were shut down, leaving us thinking and feeling as if there was no possible way to be creative or anywhere near as artistic as Picasso. Guess what? You are and you can, in your own unique way.

The truth of the matter is we are all made up of pure creative energy. Yet people have a tendency to dismiss, discount, and rob themselves of their most powerful essence, the characteristic which supports defining who they uniquely are as individuals, their creativity.

Creativity comes in all forms. We can think creatively, solving problems, collaborating with people, or inventing new tools to make our lives better. We can express ourselves creatively, such as through writing, acting, teaching, along with drawing and illustrating our ideas. We can dream big dreams like commercial travel in space, mining minerals on the moon, peace on earth for all, or talking with dolphins. Or creativity can be as simple as creating a beautiful space in your garden or knitting a scarf. Kristen, my wife’s, great creativity comes from her cooking. We all have it, the creative gene. The question is how can we expand it?

Do you have a desire to increase your creative skills and talents?

More and more of us are being defined by the limiting parameters we set for ourselves, what is commonly known as “a box.” People have them, communities have them, corporations have them, governments have them, and animals have them. Our challenge as humans is to figure out how to “break-out-of-the-box” that supports creating the limitations in our lives, the box that holds us back as individuals, communities and countries.

If we sit back for a few seconds and think about the idea of a box, we might see that some of the greatest discoveries in history have been uncovered by individuals willing to take a risk and think outside-the-box. Edison’s electric light bulb, Walt’s Disneyland, Bugsey’s Las Vegas, and American’s revolutionists are but a sampling of individuals and groups who have changed history by thinking out-of-the-box. Just by saying “I really need to think outside-the-box” we acknowledge that a box exists in the first place.

Creativity comes when we view any given situation with a fresh and different perspective, thinking outside the box. One of the greatest keys for us to more fully access and utilize our creative potential is to have a positive and open attitude. When we lock ourselves into old and non-productive paradigms we box ourselves in. The challenge is to discover the key that will open the door to support you so that you can consciously exercise your creative muscle and think out-side-the-box on a more consistent basis.

And what a muscle!

Your creativity is such a wonderful gift. When you begin to act on your creativity what you find inside may very likely be more valuable than what you showcase and share with the external world. You have everything you need to be all you can be.

Where do you want to go?

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean,
I am on the third year of a second marriage and have discovered that I have married the same type of man I was married to in my first marriage. How could I have made the same mistake twice?
Frustrated in Tulsa

Dear Frustrated,
We usually marry the person we need, on some cosmic level, to support us in our evolution as humans. The challenge is to discover what that need inside of you is. You are still the same as you have been, so how do you expect your life choices to change. My advice is to begin working on you – internally. You can only change yourself and in doing so you will find your life choices changing too.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Until next week, remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create yourself.

For me there is nothing much better than a “blank canvas” whether or not it is a large piece of paper, a living area, a boat dock or the walls of a building. The process of transforming a blank space into a visually dynamic space that inspires greater thinking is very energizing. I gravitate towards large scale mural projects that support building team and community spirit.

Saturday, at the Miami Family Crisis Center’s Resale Shop, a transformation of their staircase spirit was taking place, with the addition of one of my new murals, A Smiling Hero. The mural is a vibrant and colorful tribute to the strength and heart associated with running a crisis center. A Smiling Hero is sketched on the staircase walls and being painted by the Crisis Center team lead by Deedee Cox. I encourage you to visit these budding artists as they share the message of preventing family abuse next time you are the downtown Miami area. They are doing great work!

It is hard to believe after yesterday’s excitement and creativity that the Smiling Hero mural, this grand opportunity to add color, emotion, and team spirit almost did not happen. The mural was originally auctioned off at a fundraising for the Crisis Center in 2002. Tom Sanders paid for a wall to be built, Jeff Lundgren paid for the paint supplies and I donated my time as the artist to design and paint the mural. As time went by, changes were made in the layout of the Crisis Center Resale Shop and meeting rooms, creating limited wall space for the mural. One of the alternative possibilities that was discussed was that I could paint the mural on the outside of the Crisis Center walls. This idea started to move forward.

Over the past few years I have worked with the team to harvest their visions of what the mural could be. Studies were generated, multiple proposals were developed, and numerous presentations were made to the Crisis Center Board, Miami Community Leaders, and the Miami Chamber of Commerce. It is important to note that going into this project I knew that any kind of mural project involving many different perspectives was going to take time in order to build consensus. The excitement and scope of the project grew into a multi-wall mural project which would involve the entire Miami community in painting the murals. Things were really cooking and then they came to a stand still.

My other activities and endeavors started to consume more and more of my time and I began to think that this artistic community building project would not happen. I felt that I had done all I could do to facilitate a process to enable people to come together and reach consensus on this project. I have been attached to this happening and realized that I needed to back off and let things happen as they would.

It is interesting that when you let something go, you start to detach from the outcome, allowing new possibilities to take form. That is what happened in this situation. At the beginning of the year Deedee got in touch with me and said, “I have a wall for you. When can you paint it?” I thought to myself, “never, ever give-up.” The concept of the project was correct, it just didn’t happen in the time frame that I had planned.

So now I am thinking about the possibility of transforming other walls in Miami. You just never know. We have a good start. It takes a lot of patience and intestinal fortitude to never give-up on what ever it is you are doing. It is important to remain flexible and learn to work with people and their unique perspectives and gifts.

As Jimmy Valvano said, “Never give up! Failure and rejection are only the first step to succeeding.”

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean
I’m having a really hard time at work. Everyone is so busy and in such a hurry they are putting pressure on me to do the same. Their concept of a 40-hour week is 60-hours.
Help! What’ll I Do?

Dear What’ll I Do,
What is important to you? How you spend your time at work and play depends upon what is important to you and where you focus your energy. Some people put all their focus on work. This does not mean you have to. Consider not only the time you spend at work but think about the time you spend with family and friends, the time you create for yourself, and the time you spend to support your community. Take a look at your week and see where you focus your time and energy. Is this what you want? Focus on those things you need to support a more balanced life. Think for yourself and decide what you want to create in your life.
Keep On Keeping On,
Sean

Remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create for yourself.

Friday night is date night for Kristen, my wife, and me. On this particular evening, Kristen took me out to a Playmakers dinner show at Royal Bay Theatre in Grove entitled Random Acts. The members of this local actors troop are such fun to watch perform. As a chorus, lead by Jerry Venis, the singers even sang one of my all time favorite silly songs, “They’re coming to take me away.” Thanks, Playmakers, for a great time.

At our table were the usual suspects of such a rare treat, Jeff Lungren and his wife, Nancy, along with Charlie Holcomb and his wife, Lavinda. Charlie and I started talking about What Box? thinking, discussing such topics as skating through life, never settling, exercise, awareness, and balance. For exercise, one of the things Charlie does is run miles a day through our country back roads. Huge, because I can hardly run up the short hill at my house. I am in awe.

In contrast I shared a little about my non-existent exercise routine. No wait, I do . . . and then there’s . . . what about? I’ve got to face it, I just don’t have any kind of exercise routine in place to help my body. It is the one area in my life that is way out of balance. It has been this way for years. I know I need to do something about it but I just don’t. It’s easier not to. I drink too much, I sit on my butt too much, I enjoy fatty foods too much, and I wonder why I continue to gain weight. I even have a workout room that was specially built at the lake house so Kristen and I would not have to drive into town for a work out. Have I taken the time to get in there and exercise? Not one step in over a year. Nuts.

With over half the American adults overweight or obese I know that I am not alone in this situation. This week will see the introduction of Kirstie Alley’s new sitcom on Showtime, “Fat Actress.” Not too bad for a girl from Wichita, Kansas. Unfortunately, this kind of programming only encourages us to be more comfortable with our increasing weight gain. Perhaps this is a symptom of a nation and world out of balance?

What am I going to do to gain greater balance in my life? Spirit, Mind, Heart, and Body.

I am constantly working on increasing the abilities of my mind to think and process information, applying these understandings to my life and sharing these lessons though visuals and writings. I have always taken the time to feed my spirit through the practice of meditation, reflection, nature, awareness, and prayer. My heart is continually growing as I practice understanding and increasing my emotional intelligence.

Taking care of what my body “NEEDS” is not even on the radar screen. I talk about it, think about it, and imagine what I might do for my body. In the end I do nothing. If I am to truly live a balanced life, or if we all are to live a balanced life, we need to align our spirit, mind, heart, and body.

The time has come for a change in my life. The only person holding me back is me. I choose today to take back my body. I am going to set a regular exercise routine and follow through, reduce my alcohol intake, eat a healthier diet, and focus on improving my entire being. “This is not going to be easy” is what the voice in my head is saying right now. I will be patient with myself and allow for mistakes. I will give myself one free day to eat and drink whatever I want. I will look for continuous improvement and increased performance. I will look towards the support of my family and friends and let readers know how I am doing along the journey. I will not give up.

I am reminded that you just never know where the inspiration to make a change will come from. When I was getting dressed for Friday night’s play I had no idea that I would be writing this topic for my latest What Box? article, or that I would be inspired to take new steps to change my life for the better. Thanks Charlie. Got an extra pair of running shoes? Now the hard work begins.

Remain open, look for ways to improve, and focus on the positive.

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean
I was inspired by your article on “The Art of Vision.” I would like to have the small business that I am working with come up with a vision for the work we are doing. Would you be willing to help us, and if so, what do I need to make it happen?
Vision Help Needed in Vinita

Dear Vision Help Needed,
Fantastic that you were inspired by “The Art of Vision.” I can help and would be honored to do so. Over the last 15 years of developing strategic visions for corporations and small business organizations I have created a method I like to call a “Vision Map” that supports making strategic visioning more approachable, creative, and fun. You can learn more about my work as a graphic facilitator and strategist at www.seangriffin.com. I will be in touch soon visioning tool box in hand.
All My Best,
Sean

Remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create for yourself.

Anyone reading this week’s What Box? has the vision to see the written words on these pages, the environment in which we live and the people around us. Some of us might even have 20/20 vision or better. Maybe we have Eagle Eyes. In most cases, people have the vision to see what is in front of them.

The challenge for all of us to gain the courage to discover a “vision” for our lives and for that of our community, our state, our nation, and the world that is beyond what we can currently see. A vision that improves life for all of us, for the whole system. Although before I was born, the power of John F. Kennedy’s vision to put a man on the moon still lingers as one of the greatest visions of all time. It was considered a crazy goal for many years and then people of the U.S. became enrolled in the vision, started believing, resulting in one of the most memorable “shared visions” in modern times. The outcomes of this shared vision include tremendous technological advancements that have made our lives better and more productive. We continue to feel the ripples from the success this shared vision generated.

How long has it been since you have been inspired and motivated by a grand vision? A shared vision? Throw out the Rule Book. All it does is support keeping you in the same place you have been in. Think up a vision no one has ever thought of, a vision that will positively affect the whole. Write it down. Post it. Get excited about it. Refine it. Share it with family and friends. Start living it. Go for the brass ring!

How do we learn to see beyond what is in front of us and create a vision for the future? You know, a “Great Big Outrageous Vision” that supports the “whole” not only the self. Only when we move away from a life of mere existence for only “me” can we start to harvest the wisdom to generate a “Great Big Outrageous Vision” that inspires and motivates a better life for all.

The Six Nation Iroquois Confederacy lives by this vision. “In every deliberation we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generations.” Wow! To really take on the intensity of Iroquois thinking, we need to be thinking over 150 years out into the future. In all actuality, given the accelerated pace of technological change, we really need to be thinking more like Leonardo DaVinci. That is to be thinking an amazing 500 years out into the future.

Our world is getting smaller by the day. For any vision, be it for a city, state, or country that vision requires us to think about the generations ahead and how to enroll the local and global world into our “Great Big Outrageous Vision.” It is about creating a shared vision that people can get excited about, one that enrolls the collective whole of a community, city, state, nation and the world.

If any vision is going to take flight, it needs to become a “shared vision.” Creating a shared vision today takes courage. It has to be a big vision one that is capable of being achieved in a tangible and meaningful way. It has to stretch the status quo with progress clearly communicated. Any vision needs strong leadership to keep the vision alive along the journey of ups and downs. People have to have trust in the leadership and their ability to generate the energy and talent to hold onto the vision and make it an integral part of their decisions.

More than ever communities, cities, states, nations and countries are in need of “Great Big Outrageous Visions” that support the whole and create a better life for all, not just a select few.

What “Great Big Outrageous Vision” is inside of you? It is time to set it free. As Mark Twain said, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do, than by the things you did do. So throw off the bowlines! Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, dream, and discover.”

Let me know what you think.

Dear Sean
I read your “Thinking Differently” article. When I tried voicing my opinion that was different from my spouse’s, he was offended by my disagreeing with him. How can I say what I think in a way that will be accepted?
Confused in Langley

Dear Confused,
It warms my heart to know that you have expressed your own unique thoughts. Thinking differently and expressing those thoughts in some cases is not easy and in all likelihood will set some people off. It takes practice to find the best methods to express your unique thoughts in a manner that people will consider and in the end embrace. I like to say the following words before I let my “different thinking” loose. “I am talking out loud here” or “I realize this might be a wild idea, so how can we expand it?” “Let’s take a moment to think a little different about this situation” or “I have an out-of-the-box thought that might work in this situation.” All of these are just starting points to introduce the “different thinking” allowing the recipient to become more open to the new ideas being expressed. Give these introductions a try and experiment with your own. Keep doing what works and let the rest go. Be patient and never ever give up.
Keep on Keeping on,
Sean

Remember the only boxes that exist are the ones you create for yourself.